Most writers are introverts. Some aren’t. Increase our bounce rate and close this tab if you’re an extrovert who likes noise and lots of interaction cause this post ain’t for you. Back to the introverted writers. We have to manage in agencies where quiet offices and private cubicles are a thing of the past. Where everyone’s weekend adventures, lunch plans, and love lives are loudly discussed in open planned offices, also known as hell. Even as I write this, there is loud techno music blaring from a speaker. Lord, give me strength. This sad but true fact got the Copywriters of C27 thinking about what our Utopia would be like. Daydream with us won’t you? 

Image source: slate.com
Image source: slate.com

Hush little Writer, don’t kill a soul. In our dream office, every Copywriter would get their own designated soundproof pod like these babies. We’d get to proofread in peace and actually hear ourselves think. Hearing your own thoughts at work? What a fucking foreign concept. You wouldn’t have to listen to someone else’s playlist or realise you had been reading the same sentence over and over again for the past 5 minutes. Rules: No one is allowed to bug Writers when they’re in their Quiet Pod. We’ll emerge for the nightmare otherwise known as a brainstorm and for meetings where everyone breaks into mini discussions and absolutely nothing gets done. Oh and for lunch too. Actually on second thought, we might just stay inside for lunch with a book. 

– Michelle Obama, Senior Copywriter

Sometimes the best thing to have after sitting in for an entire day of meetings, catching up with the 300 group chats (Internal, External, Secret Internal, External That We Don’t Know Why We’re In), channeling all our energy into not calling a bomoh to hex condescending clients, and finding time to finish our assignments is a hug. Or in our case, squeezing something until all our frustrations go away.

Pillows are too soft, and stress balls don’t last long for us. It would be great if we had something that didn’t break easily if we squeezed it for too long, something that’s strong but not too solid, something that looks good (let’s be real, some of the stress toys are ugly) and makes us feel good instantly…what we need is Henry Cavill. I want Henry Cavill.

Image source: GQ Italia

– Rathika Sheila, Copywriter

Image uploaded from iOS (1)

Or if we can’t get Henry Cavill’s marvelous booty in our office, plush toys are all we ever need. You see, these little squishy creatures have this magical ability to give us peace; we can hug them when we need to or strangle them when things go to shit. Like in my case, I have Farkopf (pronounced like Schwarzkopf), my little stuffed panda. Because sometimes it’s not the best idea to lose your shit in front of your colleagues. The next best thing is to take it out on squishies like Farkopf.

Like so. (Yes, I’m aware this is not Farkopf. Meet Pan Pan.) So a haven of plush toys would be a great addition to any Copywriter’s table. Need a work break? Squishy. Need a cuddle? Squishy. Need to let out your frustrations? Squishy squishy.

(P/S: No pandas were harm in the making of this post. Or ever.)

– Beatrice Tan, Copywriter

And if none of the above are made available to you, nothing is going right in the world, Elon Musk hasn’t gone to Mars, and everything has gone to shit, get yourself a pair of noise-cancelling headphones! Tune out the bullshit of the world at the push of a button. Sony has this really great pair called the h.ear on 2 Wireless Noise Cancelling Headphones.

Image source: Sony

Just look at the dude. That’s the face of someone who’s experiencing true peace and quiet for the first fucking time in his sad, miserable life. This Shawn Mendes wannabe is in awe of the possibilities that he can achieve as he has an intellectual conversation with himself for the first time. You may ask, “Isn’t that unproductive at the workplace?” or “What if a Suit/Strat comes up to you for something and you have to take them off creating more of a hassle?” Well to you sir/madam/everything-in-between, I say, fuck you.

This pair of headphones from the heavens has a feature called Ambient Sound which lets you hear external sounds so you don’t have to take off this God-sent creation when someone comes to bug you.

(P/S: No, this isn’t an ad for Sony, although I wouldn’t mind a free pair from them cause ya boy is broke. So if you’re reading this Sony, ask yourselves, what would Jesus do?)

– Khairul Raimi, Junior Copywriter

As you can tell by now, the Copywriters have been under quite a bit of stress lately. We’re actually very simple creatures. Just give us our own space, some quiet, and a yummy snack every now and then, and we can be civil. Whether we choose to be or not is a story for another blog post.